


Lost and Found

by misslymiss



Category: The 100 (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-04-15
Updated: 2015-05-30
Packaged: 2018-03-23 01:09:43
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 19,818
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3749386
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/misslymiss/pseuds/misslymiss
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Clarke is very glad when the stranger speaks first, because for a moment, she does not remember a single word of the English language.<br/>“Hi, I’m Lexa. My sister told me that you found my phone?”</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Clexa modern au.
> 
> Come say hi: misslymiss.tumblr.com

“I can’t believe you talked me into this.”

Lexa has just stepped into the club and she is already overwhelmed. The first thing she notices is the sheer number of people. They are everywhere, occupying every inch of space, dancing, singing and spilling their drinks. Lexa is fairly certain she has never seen so many people in the same place at the same time. The flashing lights blind her and the music is deafening. She can feel the bass pulsing in her bones her ears are already buzzing. This was not how she was planning on spending her Friday night. She would much rather be at home, reading a book. 

“Come on, it will be fun,” Anya shouts over the music. She takes Lexa by the hand and leads her to the bar.

There is a small crowd around the bar, but Anya expertly pushes her way to the front, dragging Lexa behind her. A young man behind the counter pours four shots of vodka, at Anya’s request.

Lexa points out that there are only two of them, to which Anya laughs and tilts her head back twice in quick succession, downing two shots in record time. She smiles at Lexa and motions for her to do the same. Lexa obliges, wincing after each shot. Anya pats her little sister on the back approvingly and drags her to the dancefloor.

Lexa puts on a smile for her sister and dances awkwardly with her. She doesn’t like the feeling that people are watching her dance, judging her, laughing at her. She doesn’t know what to do with her arms, and she hates being pushed around by the people dancing around her. Lexa watches Anya turn from her, grab a handsome young man and start to dance with him.

Her sister’s attention being elsewhere, Lexa takes the opportunity to slip away. She looks around and finds a quieter spot in the back of the club and heads over there, pushing her way through the crowd. She props herself up against the wall, hoping no one notices her. Once the alcohol starts to take effect and her senses are slightly dulled, the loud music and flashing lights don’t bother her as much. She notices that she has a good view of the bar from where she is standing and spots a cute blonde standing behind the bar, pouring drinks. Lexa can’t take her eyes off her. She is hypnotized by the way she effortlessly balances charm, politeness and efficiency. She is mesmerized by her smile and the way she tucks her golden hair behind her ears. She watches her pour drink after drink, occasionally downing one of her own.

Lexa doesn’t know how long she has been staring at the bartender when her view is obscured by a figure standing in front of her. She looks up and sees a middle-aged man smiling down at her hungrily. He is tall, but skinny and his clothes are an obvious attempt at trying to look younger than he is. He runs his hand through his greasy hair.

“Hey baby, wanna dance?”

“I’m not interested.”

“Oh come on, don’t play hard to get.” He takes her hand, which she immediately pulls out of his grasp.

“Did I make myself unclear?” She articulates every word clearly, her jaw tense.

He steps towards her. “Sweetheart-”

Before he has time time to finish his sentence, Lexa’s fist has made contact with his solar plexus and he is doubled over, gasping for air. She slips away and makes her way to the bathroom, where she bends over the sink, trying to collect herself. She slips her phone out of her pocket, hoping for a message from anyone who needs her to be anywhere but here. She sets her phone down on the counter and splashes her face with cold water. When she looks at her reflection in the mirror, she notes her makeup has smudged around her eyes and run down her cheeks. She looks menacing like this, she thinks, with her makeup smudged like warpaint. She wipes it away carefully before gathering her courage and walking out of the bathroom. She spots Anya dancing with three different guys and makes her way towards her. She shakes her sister’s shoulder when she reaches her.

“I have to go.”

Anya nods and waves her goodbye before resuming her dancing. Lexa pushes her way out of the club and clambers into a taxi. She gives her address to the driver and slumps in the back seat. She is not usually one to slump, but she makes an exception. There is no one to see her in any case. She reaches in her pocket for her phone. When her fingers grasp emptiness, she feels panic rising in her chest. She checks all her other pockets as she thinks back. _The bathroom_. She left her phone on the counter of the bathroom. As much as she hates losing her phone, she hates the thought of going back to that club even more. _It is probably gone by now, in any case_ , she thinks. She lets the taxi take her home, hoping someone honest stumbles across her phone and gives it back to her.

 

***

 

Clarke wakes up with a headache. She’s not supposed to drink on the job, but she doesn’t turn down a drink when it’s offered to her. And let’s face it, she’s a pretty girl; she gets offered a lot of drinks. She always regrets it the next morning.

She slowly opens her eyes, the light aggravating her hangover. She peers at her clock. _12:36_. It’s not an unusual time for her to wake up, considering she works at a night club. She looks down and notes that she is fully dressed. That is not unusual either. She is often so tired (and drunk) by the time she gets home that when she finds her bed, she falls into it without taking the time to get undressed.

Clarke stretches and yawns, then rolls out of bed. She briefly considers getting changed, but sniffs her clothes and, when the smell fine, she heads downstairs.

 “Good morning sunshine!”

Clarke groans at her roommate’s cheeriness. Raven is a morning person, and she has always been awake for hours by the time Clarke gets up. She is a good roommate, and a great friend, but Clarke hates everyone when she has just woken up. Raven points to the coffee pot.

“I made coffee.”

That cheers Clarke up significantly. She heads over to the coffee pot and pours herself a cup, then slumps into a chair. After a few sips, Clarke turns to Raven.

“Have I ever told you I love you?”

Raven grins. “Only every time I make coffee.”

Clarke finishes the rest of her cup and pours herself another. Raven finishes preparing her lunch and turns to Clarke.

“Want some?”

“Uh, I just got up. I’m not ready for real food yet.”

“Suit yourself.”

Raven sits down and starts eating while Clarke makes herself some toast. She has just taken a very large mouthful of toast when an unfamiliar notification sound comes from her pocket. Clarke reaches in her pocket and pulls out a phone. Raven looks at her questioningly.

“That’s not your phone.”

Clarke finishes her mouthful and retorts “No shit, Sherlock.”

She thinks back to the night before and the memories slowly come back to her. She remembers finding the phone on the bathroom counter and slipping it into her pocket.

“I found it in the ladies’ room at the club. I didn’t trust the people there to return it, so I figured I would give it back myself.”

Raven squints her eyes and contorts her face in what Clarke has learned to recognize as the face she makes when she’s concentrating, or thinking up some crazy plan.

“Oh! I could probably use the phone to track down the girl’s address and then you could bring it back directly!”

“Raven, do you realize how creepy that would be?”

“Do you have a better idea?”

“Yeah, I call the first person on the contact list.”

Raven shrugs. “I like my way better.”

Clarke rolls her eyes and opens the phone’s contacts. She taps on the first name, Anya, and brings the phone up to her ear. After a few rings, a croaky voice answers.

“Hey, Lexa. What’s up?”

“Um hi, this isn’t Lexa.”

“Oh don’t tell me she finally got laid? You two meet at the club last night?”

“Actually, I found this phone at the club last night and I’m trying to return it. Can you get- Lexa was it?- to come and pick it up at my place?”

“Sure, I’m heading back to our place now, I can give her your address.”

 

***

 

Anya turns her key in the door and swings it open. She hangs up her jacket and throws her key on the kitchen counter.

“Lexa, you here?”

Lexa is sitting on the couch and looks up from her book when Anya walks in. She closes her book carefully and places it on the table beside her.

“Hey, where were you last night?”

Anya sits down next to her. “I met a cute guy at the club and spent the night with him. I texted you.”

Lexa sighs sadly. “I lost my phone.”

“I know. This girl called saying she found your phone last night. She gave me her address so you can go pick it up.”

Relief washes over Lexa. The only photos she has of Costia are on her phone. Even though they broke up a long time ago, she would hate to lose the last thing she has left of her.

Anya scoots up next to Lexa and puts her arm around her.

“It’s not like you to lose things. Is everything ok?”

“Yeah, I just… I didn’t enjoy myself very much at the club and left in a bit of a hurry.”

“I’m sorry, Lexa. I wouldn’t have brought you if I’d known you would hate it so much. I was really hoping you would have a good time, maybe meet a nice girl…”

Anya drifts off and Lexa smiles. She knows Anya’s intentions were good, but she really wishes she would stop trying to find her a girlfriend. And to think that she had been scared of coming out to her all those years ago. They are all each other has, and they love each other unconditionally. Lexa doesn’t remember her parents; she was very young when they died. Their uncle Gustus took care of them until Anya was old enough to get custody of Lexa. The two of them have their rough patches, but they know that they will always have each other.

Lexa hugs her sister and kisses her on the cheek. Anya hands her a piece of paper with an address scrawled across it. Lexa takes it, grabs her keys and a jacket, and heads out the door.

 

***

 

Clarke steps into the shower and lets the scalding water wash away the makeup she never took off from the night before. She washes off the stickiness of the drinks that were spilled on her and rinses the grime out of her hair. Clarke likes to sing in the shower, and at the moment, her guilty pleasure is Fifth Harmony. She sings _Sledgehammer_ at the top of her lungs and uses her shampoo bottle as a microphone. She knows Raven hates the song, and she sings it partly to annoy her, and partly because Clarke actually really likes the song (which she would never admit to anyone other than Raven).

Once her solo performance is over, Clarke turns off the water and steps out of the shower. She dries herself off, runs a brush through her hair and gets dressed in plain shorts and a t-shirt. She crosses Raven as she walks out of the bathroom.

“You really need to find a new song to sing in the shower.”

Clarke’s response is to take Raven’s hands in her own and spin her around, singing loudly.

“ _You're taking over the beat of my body_  
_You just don't let up, don't let up_  
_You're taking over the beat of my body_  
_But you lift me up, lift me up_  
_If you take my pulse right now_  
_It would feel just like a sledgehammer_ ”

Raven manages to escape and puts her hands on her hips, pretending to be offended. She can’t keep a straight face for long and grins at Clarke, hitting her shoulder playfully.

“You idiot.”

“I love you too.”

Clarke laughs and heads downstairs. She sprawls herself on the sofa and turns on the TV. She is in the middle of an exciting episode of _Real Housewives_ when she hears a knock at the door. She mutes the television and walks to the door. She swings it open and finds a tall, striking girl standing in front of her. Her hair is tied in a long braid and her green eyes widen slightly at the sight of Clarke. She is wearing a leather jacket over a white t-shirt and her black jeans follow the curve of her long legs down to a pair of converses. Clarke is very glad when the stranger speaks first, because for a moment, she does not remember a single word of the English language.

“Hi, I’m Lexa. My sister told me that you found my phone?”

Clarke manages to pull herself out of her trance.

“Yeah, come in. It’s upstairs; I’ll go get it.”

Lexa steps in and looks around. When Clarke is out of sight, she lets out the breath she had been holding. The pretty bartender found her phone? She doesn’t usually believe in fate, but she can’t help but wonder if perhaps this is a sign of some sort. She shakes off the thought, smiling at her silliness. She is starting to sound like her sister.

Lexa takes in her surroundings and spots an easel in the corner of the room. She can’t help herself from walking towards it. When she reaches it, she sees a canvas leaning against the wall and turns to examine it. It’s a painting of a two-headed deer looking directly at her. The colors are unusual, and the brush strokes are bold and commanding. It takes Lexa’s breath away.

Lexa is so mesmerized by the painting that she forgets where she is. She is brought back to her senses by the sound of Clarke coming down the stairs. It’s too late to go back to the entrance and pretend she wasn’t prying, so she stays where she is. Clarke joins Lexa and extends her arm, holding out her phone. Lexa takes it gratefully and pockets it, before motioning to the painting.

“Did you paint this?”

Clarke looks embarrassed.

“Yeah… I have weird dreams.”

“It’s beautiful.”

Clarke’s embarrassment turns to pride. She smiles at Lexa, her eyes lighting up. “You think so?”

Lexa nods seriously. “Yes.”

“Some of my paintings are being featured at an art exposition tomorrow. You can come if you want.”

Lexa cannot think of anything she would rather do tomorrow than spend more time with this girl. “I suppose I could; I am free tomorrow.”

Clarke writes down the address and time and hands the piece of paper to Lexa, who carefully slips it in her pocket.

“I’m Clarke, by the way.”

“Nice to meet you, Clarke.”

Clarke smiles escorts Lexa to the door. Lexa stops at the threshold and turns to Clarke.

“Thank you for returning my phone, Clarke.” She wants to say more, she can’t find the words to express her feelings, so she turns and leaves.

 

***

 

When Lexa wakes up on the Sunday, the only thing on her mind is that she is going to see Clarke again today. She tries to push the thought out of her mind; she really shouldn’t be thinking this much about someone she doesn’t know at all. She goes through the things she knows about the blonde: her name is Clarke, she’s beautiful, she’s a bartender and an artist and she was kind enough to return her phone. And Lexa is going to see her again today. Her heart bounds in her chest at the thought.

She knows there’s no way she is going back to sleep and slips out of bed. She carefully makes her bed and opens her curtains, letting the sunlight pour into the room. She has never been one to decorate much. Her room is simple, the walls are white and most of her furniture is in shades of black and grey. The one splash of color is a red pillow propped up against the headboard of her bed. Anya gave it to her, claiming that her room was depressing and needed more color. Lexa indulges her sister and has grown fond of the pillow.

Lexa heads quietly to the kitchen, her bare feet making very little noise against the cold floor. She knows that Anya is still sleeping; Lexa is a light sleeper and the slightest noise jolts her awake. She always knows when Anya gets up. She makes herself a cup of tea and heads back to her room, where she sits on her bed and reads her book in an attempt to take her mind of Clarke.

It’s not working.

She peers at her clock. It reads _7:58_. She calculates quickly in her head; she’ll be seeing Clarke again in just over ten hours. She sighs and lets herself fall face down on her bed. She buries her face in her blankets, trying to get Clarke’s beautiful face out of her head.

“Rough morning?”

Lexa lifts her face from her blankets. Anya is leaning against her doorframe, eyeing her suspiciously.

“Oh Anya, I’m in a bit of a predicament.”

Anya takes that as an invitation and sits next to Lexa. She pulls back her hair and starts to braid it. The repetitive motion calms Lexa, like it always did when she was young. Anya ties the braid and rests her hand on Lexa’s back.

“Wanna talk about it?”

Lexa sits up straighter and turns towards her sister, thinking carefully about her next words.

“The girl who returned my phone.” Lexa sighs and Anya raises an eyebrow knowingly. “She’s a bartender at that club we went to. I spent the whole night watching her, and she’s the one who found my phone. And she’s so beautiful.” Lexa shakes her head. “I don’t even know her!”

Lexa can’t help a smile from growing on her face when she says “She invited me to her art exhibition.”

“When is it?”

“At six.”

Anya gets up.  “Ok, we’re keeping you busy until then. Come on, get dressed!”

Lexa smiles gratefully at her sister and rummages through her drawers in search of something to wear.

 

***

 

“Come on, Lexa. Don’t you want to buy clothes with a bit more color?”

“But I like black!”

-

“What are you ordering?”

“I can’t decide.”

“Just order the chocolate cake, Lexa. You know you want to!”

-

“Which movie do you want to see?”

“I don’t mind. Just not a romantic one.”

 

***

 

After spending half an hour deciding what to wear, and another hour doing her hair and makeup, Clarke heads downstairs. Raven looks up from her computer and gawks.

“Shit, Clarke. Trying to impress someone?”

Clarke flushes. Lexa had been in the back of her mind while she was getting ready. She knows it’s silly, but she’s looking forward to seeing her again.

“My paintings are being featured at an art gallery. I want to look nice!”

“Oh shit, that’s today?” Raven winces apologetically. “I’m so sorry, Clarke! I know I said I would come, but I promised Bellamy I would help him rewire his place. You know he’ll electrocute himself if I let him do it by himself.”

Clarke smiles and shakes her head. “It’s fine. I invited Lexa, so I won’t be alone.”

“Um… Who’s Lexa?”

“The girl whose phone I found. She saw my painting when she came to pick up her phone. I invited her.” Clarke shrugs.

“So you _are_ trying to impress someone!”

Raven grins when she sees color creep up her roommate’s cheeks. She takes Clarke’s shoulders and gives them a little shake.

“Come on, spill.”

“There’s not much to say. I don’t know anything about her! But she’s really pretty and mysterious.”

Raven nods seriously. “Well, what are you waiting for? Go get her!”

Clarke turns to leave and Raven gives her a playful slap on the butt. Clarke grins back at her and heads out the door.

 

***

 

Lexa walks into the art gallery with her head held high. She will not let her emotions get the better of her, she decides. She is here to look at some nice paintings, and maybe make a new friend. That’s it. Or at least that’s what she’s been desperately trying to convince herself of. The fact that she spent an hour deciding what to wear has nothing to do with Clarke. She finally settled on a simple black dress. She can’t find a good excuse for the fluttering in her stomach, so she tries to ignore it.  

The art gallery’s walls are covered with paintings of different shapes, sizes and colors. Lexa has always loved art. When she was younger, she would spend days in the museum, taking in the beauty of the paintings. She was very disappointed when she tried her hand at painting and realized that she had absolutely no artistic skill whatsoever. She sticks to enjoying the art; she does not attempt to create it. But she admires those who do (and she tries to convince herself that it’s the reason she feels so intrigued by Clarke).

Lexa does not recognize any of the paintings as Clarke’s, so she moves deeper into the gallery. She glances at the paintings as she walks by them, searching for Clarke’s familiar style. When she reaches Clarke’s section, she _knows_. These are Clarke’s work, there is no doubt about it. Lexa looks around for any sign of Clarke, and when she doesn’t find her, she turns to examine the paintings.

They are mostly related to nature. The two-headed deer she saw in Clarke’s apartment is there, beside paintings of mutated horses and forests clouded with yellow fog. Lexa is intrigued: these paintings are dark and twisted, but they are contrasted by the vibrant colors that were used to depict them. Lexa remembers Clarke mentioning that she had strange dreams. She wonders if these are all images that came to her in her sleep, and why she is haunted by such strange thoughts.

“Lexa! I’m glad you could make it.”

Clarke is smiling at Lexa as if it’s the greatest thing in the world to find her here. Lexa attributes that to Clarke’s happiness at finding someone who enjoys her work. It certainly can’t have anything to do with _her_. She barely knows her, after all.

Lexa’s eyes linger momentarily on the collarbones that Clarke’s dress exposes and smiles politely. “These are beautiful Clarke. Are you trying to sell them?” she asks, noticing the price tags under each painting.

“Yeah, that’s the goal. Bartending barely pays the bills, so I try to get a little extra when I can. I hate the schmoozing that goes with the whole thing, though.”

Lexa nods. “I’m sure you will sell these. People would have to be blind not to see the beauty in them.”

Clarke blushes at the compliment and tucks a loose strand of hair behind her ear. Lexa gestures towards the paintings.

“Is it hard to part with them? After spending so much time working on them?”

Clarke sighs. “It’s always difficult. But I do what I have to, and I just hope that the people who buy them take good care of them. The one of the deer is my favorite, though. I really hope it goes somewhere nice.”

Lexa nods in understanding. She can’t imagine putting in hours of her time, as well as blood, sweat and tears into a project that she would have to part with. She glances at the price tag beneath the painting of the deer. 1000$. She sighs internally; she cannot afford it. She turns back towards Clarke and catches her staring at her. They both blush and look away. Lexa closes her eyes for a moment, letting her emotions wash off her, like water off a polished stone. When she opens her eyes again, she is in control of her sentiments. She turns back towards Clarke calmly.

“You mentioned that you have strange dreams. Is that where the inspiration for those paintings comes from?”

“Yeah, ever since… Well, I went through a bad breakup and I’ve had weird dreams since then. I guess it’s a good thing, you know, considering it gives me inspiration.”

Lexa nods. She remembers having trouble sleeping after she and Costia broke up.

“I went through a bad breakup some time ago. I understand.”

Clarke smiles gratefully at Lexa. “This might be a bad time to bring this up, but are you… seeing anyone-”

“Clarke Griffin?” a loud, booming voice calls.

They both turn towards the grossly overweight man who interrupted them. The suit he is wearing is too tight for him and Lexa notes that his underarms are soaked. She crinkles her nose in disgust.

“Yes, that’s me.” Clarke answers politely.

“I might be interested in purchasing one of your paintings, young lady.” Clarke is unsure if he is smiling or grimacing at her, but she responds with her best _buy my painting_ smile.

Lexa is furious. She is fairly certain that Clarke was about to ask her if she was available. And the answer to that is _yes yes yes absolutely_. But Lexa is scared. She is not used to having difficulty containing her emotions. She feels her face turn red with fury at this stranger who interrupted them, and she slips away discreetly to the bathroom.

She closes her eyes and takes ten deep breaths before opening them again and staring at herself in the mirror. She goes through what she knows in her head: she barely knows Clarke, but she really likes her. She can’t control her emotions when she is around her. She is scared.

As a child, Lexa had been impulsive and loud, and it had gotten her into a lot of trouble. She always bit her tongue too late and regretted the things she did while she was angry. When she finally learned to control her emotions, she promised herself she would never let them get the better of her ever again. She is breaking this promise now, and she knows that Clarke is responsible.

As much as it pains her, Lexa leaves the art gallery without looking back.

It’s for the best. Or at least, that is what she tries to tell herself.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Come say hi: misslymiss.tumblr.com

After two hours of being pleasant and polite to everyone at the art gallery, Clarke is in a foul mood. And the fact that Lexa disappeared without a trace does nothing to improve it. She is fairly certain that she scared Lexa off by trying to asking her out. _It was too_ soon, she scolds herself, _she’s obviously not interested_. She decides that Lexa probably did her a favor, disappearing instead of putting her through the embarrassment of rejecting her. That doesn’t stop Clarke from kicking herself. Lexa had given her no indication that she was interested in being anything more than just friends, and she should have respected that. But of course she had to go ahead and make assumptions, and act without thinking (as she usually does). She has always thought that being spontaneous was one of her good qualities; she’s not so sure anymore.

As she walks back home, her mind wanders back to Lexa and how beautiful she looked in that black dress that hugged her in all the right places, and showed just enough leg. She thinks back to how Lexa had walked around like she had owned the place, and stopped in front of Clarke’s work, recognizing it instantly. She goes through their whole conversation in her head, including the part where she had been caught staring, and the embarrassment that ensued. She remembers the rude man who had interrupted her and she feels her anger rise.

Clarke storms into her apartment and throws herself on the couch. Raven looks up from the dismantled computer she is prodding at and raises an eyebrow.

“That bad, huh?”

Clarke flops over and sighs. “She just _left_. I was just asking her out, and we got interrupted and she _left_!” Clarke slams her fist down on the couch. She is angry. Angry at herself for being too forward. Angry at Lexa for leaving without saying anything. And especially angry at the man who interrupted them.

“At least I sold a painting. I’ll pay you back for last month’s rent.”

Clarke had told Lexa that bartending paid the bills, but that is not entirely true. Raven often has to cover both halves of the rent, but Clarke always repays her as soon as she sells a painting. Raven doesn’t seem to mind.

Raven pokes her tongue out the side of her mouth as she puts the last pieces of the computer in place. She swiftly closes it up before stretching out her stiff back and heading towards Clarke.

“Dude, don’t beat yourself up. Maybe there was an emergency and she had to leave… Or something.”

Clarke rolls her eyes. “Yeah, sure.”

Raven gently punches Clarke’s arm. “I told you that you should have let me track down her address. Now at least you could find her.”

“Not helping, Raven,” Clarke groans.

“Sorry. You don’t even have her phone number or anything?”

Clarke shakes her head and sighs. Raven puts her arms around her and pulls her into a hug. Clarke resists at first, then closes her eyes and lets herself be held. She cherishes the friendship she has with Raven. They have a closeness that only comes from going through hardship together. And although Clarke had a crush on her for a while, they have never been anything more than friends. Amazing friends, Clarke reminds herself. She breathes in her friend’s familiar scent and feels her mood start to improve marginally.

Clarke is jolted from her reverie by her phone ringing in her pocket. Raven releases her hold and Clarke bolts upright, her mind racing. Is it possible that Lexa _did_ have a valid reason for leaving the art gallery? Is she calling her now to explain? Clarke’s heartbeat accelerates as fumbles for her phone and presses the _answer_ button.

“Hello?” she asks breathlessly.

Her stomach sinks when she hears a man answer her. “Clarke?”

 “Yes.”

“Hi, this is Marcus Kane.”

“Oh, hi. What’s going on?”

Clarke frowns in confusion. Why would her boss be calling her? She is not working tonight. She rarely has anything to do with him, and he certainly never calls. In fact, she is fairly certain that the last time she spoke to him was when he hired her, a few months ago.

“I’ve had complaints that you were drinking on the job. I’m afraid I’m going to have to let you go.”

Clarke feels like she has been punched in the stomach. Just when she though her day couldn’t get any worse, she was proven wrong. She runs her hand through her hair, digesting the information and its implications. She was already having trouble keeping up with the rent. The painting she sold will keep her going for a little while, but not for very long. Clarke feels like she is drowning, and the only thing keeping her afloat has been ripped away from her. Her first instinct is to beg Kane not to fire her, but she knows him well enough to know that his firm morals would never allow it. Her second instinct is to be polite and respectful. She ignores it.

“Fuck you, Kane.”

She hangs up and throws her phone down on the couch angrily. Raven, who has been observing her inquisitively until then, sneaks her arms back around Clarke and hold her tight. Clarke’s eyes start to fill with tears.

“He fucking fired me!”

Clarke doesn’t try to hold back her tears. She lets them roll down her cheeks and she lets Raven soothe her. Raven keeps one arm around Clarke and disengages the other. She pulls out her phone, dials, and brings it to her ear.

“Hey Bell. We’re having a bit of a situation here. Call everyone and get them to bring their asses over here ok? Oh, and bring alcohol.”

 

***

 

Bellamy arrives first, with a six-pack of beer in each hand.

“You called?”

Raven takes the beers and gestures towards the couch where Clarke is lying, trying to control her tears. Clarke hates seeming weak, especially in front of her friends. She feels that she always has to be the strong one for her them. She was there for Octavia when she broke up with Atom, and she had been there for Raven when she had broken her leg. She prefers taking care of people than being taken care of. But she can’t bring herself to put on her brave façade; she doesn’t have the strength to. Not today. Maybe just this once she can let herself be taken care of.

Octavia arrives next with a bottle of vodka. It doesn’t take her long to spot Clarke. She makes her way towards her and twists the cap off the bottle, handing it to Clarke. Clarke smiles at her gratefully before sitting up and taking a few gulps directly from the bottle. She hands the bottle back to Octavia, who takes a few sips.

Monty and Jasper arrive last. Jasper spots the beer and the vodka, and nudges Monty.

 “See, I told you we should have brought alcohol!”

Octavia chuckles. “They’ve been dating how long, 6 months? Look at them, they’re already acting like a married couple!”

Monty chooses not to acknowledge Octavia’s comment. He turns to Jasper. “There’s plenty of alcohol here already. Besides, we have something better.” He smiles mysteriously and slides off his backpack. He unzips it slowly, attempting to create suspense. Everyone turns towards him curiously.

“Board games!” he exclaims, pulling _Clue_ out of his bag. They all laugh at this, and even Clarke can’t help but smile. Raven makes space on the table and everyone grabs a chair. Clarke chooses Mrs. White, Octavia opts for Mrs. Peacock, and Raven takes Miss Scarlet. Bellamy picks Colonel Mustard, Monty chooses Professor Plum after careful consideration, and Jasper, Mr. Green. Once everyone is installed, Octavia can’t contain her curiosity anymore.

“Clarke, if you don’t want to talk about it, it’s totally fine. But maybe we could help you better if we knew what was going on?”

Clarke has been expecting this; she knows her friends well enough to know that they can’t tame their curiosity for long. And although Octavia was the first to speak out, Clarke can see Monty peeking curiously from being the instruction booklet and Jasper pretending to be very interested in the beer can he is holding. She takes a deep breath, organizing her thoughts.

“I’ve had a really bad day.” Clarke pauses, swallowing the ball in her throat. She doesn’t want to cry, not front of her friends. “At the art gallery, I was just asking a girl out when we got interrupted. And when I turned back around, she was gone. And on top of it, I just got fired from my job.”

Octavia gets up and gives Clarke a hug. “I’m so sorry, Clarke.”

“Wow that sucks.” Jasper observes.

“She didn’t deserve you anyways.” Monty adds, putting down the instruction manual.

“Your boss is a jerk.” Bellamy chimes in. He smiles at her reassuringly and hands her a beer.

Once their curiosity is appeased, they begin their game. Clarke feels her heart warm as she thinks of how lucky she is to have friends who will come at a moment’s notice when she is in trouble, and who will be there for her no matter what.

 

***

 

It has been five days since Lexa left the art gallery and turned her back on Clarke. If she thought that Clarke’s presence was making her emotions hard to control, her absence has been even worse. She has been feeling frustrated and angry, and she has not been able to focus. This has been particularly problematic, and she is already getting behind on her assignments. She usually takes pride in finishing assignments weeks before they are due, but lately, she has been spending too much time thinking about Clarke, and not enough time focusing on her studies.

Lexa turns on her computer and starts working on her paper on acid rain and its ecological consequences. She is able to write two sentences before Clarke winds her way into her mind. She tries to push the thought away, but without much success. She pops in her earphones and blasts music as loud as possible, hoping that the sound of the music will drown out her thoughts. It doesn’t work. She stares blankly at her screen for ten minutes before she gives up and pulls her earphones. After careful consideration, she finally decides to go find her sister.

Anya is in her room, lying on her bed and wearing headphones. She is blasting her music so loud that Lexa can hear it from the doorway. Anya spots her sister and sits up on her bed, pausing her music.

Lexa shakes her head. “You will ruin your hearing, you know.” She knows she is being a hypocrite, but she can’t help herself from lecturing her older sister.

Anya smiles ruefully. “What’s going on, Lexa?”

“I’m ready to talk about it know.”

Lexa is referring to the night she left the art gallery. When she came back home to Anya, she had refused to talk about what had happened and had locked herself in her room. The past few days, she has left her room only to go to class, to go to the bathroom, or to get herself something to eat. Anya has been trying to help her, but she is in over her head. The last time she saw her sister like this was after Costia had broken up with her. She had not been able to help then either. After a few weeks, Lexa had emerged from her room cold and detached, and she had stayed that way ever since.

Anya pats her bed and Lexa clambers onto it. She settles down next to her sister, and looks down at her hands. Anya does not push her to talk; she waits for Lexa to open up on her own. After some time, Lexa finally gathers her courage and speaks up.

“The other night, at the art gallery, Clarke was about to ask me out.”

Anya raises an eyebrow. “And…?”

“And I left. I ran away.”

Lexa takes a long pause, organizing her thoughts. Anya doesn’t interrupt her; she knows Lexa needs time to untangle her thoughts and emotions from the web they have spun themselves into.

“I was scared,” Lexa finally admits. “I have difficulty controlling my emotions around her.”

Anya nods. She knows how scared Lexa is of her own emotions; she helped her deal with them as a child, and she saw Lexa transform after her breakup with Costia. But it breaks her heart to see her sister trying to go through life emotionless, loveless. Anya sighs.

“Are you only scared of your emotions, or are you scared of having your heart broken again?”

Lexa frowns and bites her lip. “Both,” she concedes.

Anya nods. “If you’re not letting yourself feel, then you’re not letting yourself live. You have to be brave enough to give your heart to someone else. And maybe it will get broken, but you at least have to try.”

Lexa has always valued her sister’s opinion, and she gives her advice some serious thought. She had loved Costia, and parting ways with her had shattered her heart into a thousand pieces. But she had never regretted being with her, and she had never regretted loving her. Lexa finally looks up at her sister and quotes:

“ _Tis better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all_.”

Anya breaks into a smile. “Would you like to go clubbing with me, little sister?”

 

***

 

The second time Lexa enters the club, it is just as overwhelming as the first. This time, however, she has a purpose. She has the whole thing planned out already: she will find Clarke, apologize for leaving in a hurry at the art gallery, and ask her on a date. She tries to ignore the gnawing sensation in her stomach. She will not let her fear hold her back this time.

Anya gives her an encouraging smile, and Lexa makes her way to the bar. She recognizes the bartender as the one who served them last time. She gathers her courage, and asks:

“Excuse-me, is Clarke here?” She has to shout in order to be heard over the music.

The bartender gives her a blank look. Lexa insists.

“Clarke, she works here. Where is she?”

His eyes light up in understanding and he shakes his head.

“She doesn’t work here anymore; she got fired. Something about drinking on the job, I think.”

Lexa’s heart sinks. It had never occurred to her that Clarke would no longer be working here. She hates it when things don’t go as planned. She can feel her frustration rising as she makes her way back to Anya.

“She doesn’t work her anymore. We’re leaving.”

Lexa storms out of the building, Anya close behind her. She stops once they are outside and buries her face in her hands.

“How am I supposed to find her now?”

Anya gives the question some thought. “You have her address, don’t you?”

Lexa slowly lifts her face from her hands, meeting her sister’s eye. _Of course_. She had forgotten. She doesn’t like the idea of showing up at Clarke’s apartment uninvited, but she decides that she will not let fear get in her way again. She checks her watch. _23:00_. It’s late, but she wants to do it before she loses her nerve.

 

***

 

“All in.” Clarke smiles mischievously and pushes all her chips towards the center of the table.

Octavia sighs and throws her cards down, signifying she’s out. Raven, Monty and Jasper follow suit. Bellamy hesitates. He eyes her suspiciously, looking for any hint of a bluff in her face, and he must find one, because he smirks confidently.

“I call.”

Clarke smiles innocently and lays her cards down on the table.

“Full house.”

Bellamy swears and reveals his three aces. He starts counting out the chips he owes Clarke, pouting.

Clarke is grateful that Raven has been inviting their friends over more often lately. They make her smile, and they almost make her forget about Lexa. Almost. This is the third time they have come over, and Clarke is slowly starting to feel like things might start to go back to normal. She has found a new job, and she has been doing her best to forget Lexa. She has found the best solution is drowning her sorrows in alcohol.

Clarke takes a sip of her beer and stands up.

“I have to pee,” she announces before she climbs the stairs, disappearing into the bathroom. Monty starts shuffling the cards in preparation for the next round when there is a soft knock at the door. They turn towards Raven for an explanation, and she shrugs. No one makes a move to answer the door.

“I’ll get it,” Jasper sighs.

He walks over to the door and opens it slightly. He finds a tall girl with long curly hair and beautiful green eyes staring back at him. She takes a step back and checks the address with a confused look on her face. Jasper bows.

“How may I help you, m’lady?”

She takes another step back.

“I’m sorry, I must have the wrong address.”

Jasper bows again and closes the door. He makes his way back to the table, where he lets himself fall down in his chair with a gleam in his eyes.

“Wow, she was hot!”

Monty glares at him, and Jasper shrugs. “What? Just because you’re on a diet doesn’t mean you can’t look at the menu!”

“Who are you guys talking about?” Clarke asks as she makes her way back down the stairs.

Jasper sighs amorously. “This girl who knocked at your door. Wrong address. But wow, she was hot!”

Clarke freezes. She runs over to Jasper and roughly grabs the lapels of his jacket. “What did she look like?”

“Uh… She was tall?”

Clarke shakes him violently.

“Brown hair… curly! Green eyes!” Jasper stammers, a hint of panic in his voice.

“Shit.”

Clarke releases Jasper and runs out the door. Jasper turns to Raven, stunned.

“What just happened?”

Raven looks just as confused as he is, for a moment. Then, understanding floods her. She bolts upright and runs out the door after Clarke.

She finds her kneeling on the sidewalk, her shoulders slumped. She has rarely seen her friend so defeated.

“She’s gone... Again!”

Sure enough, the street is empty and there is no sign of Lexa.

“Maybe it wasn’t her?” Raven offers, but even she is not convinced.

“Of course it was! And now that she thinks I don’t live here anymore, she has no way of finding me! Fuck. My. Life.”

Raven takes Clarke’s hand gently in her own and leads her back inside, where the others are staring at them blankly. They stay quiet as Raven leads Clarke upstairs.

“Raven, can I sleep with you tonight?”

“Yeah, sure. I’ll join you in a minute, ok?”

Clarke nods and Raven heads back downstairs.

“Um yeah, so that was _the girl_. And that she thinks that Clarke has moved, she has no way of getting in touch.”

Jasper looks like he’s been found guilty of murder. He runs his hands through his hair, his eyes wide.

“Oh god, it’s all my fault!”

“No, Jasper, it’s not.” Monty rubs Jasper’s back comfortingly. “You didn’t know.”

Monty has to lead Jasper out of the apartment by the hand, and Octavia and Bellamy follow them out a few seconds later.

Once they are gone, Raven makes her way upstairs to her room. She finds Clarke already lying in her bed. She pokes her arm, but she is already asleep. Raven slips into her bed clothes and lies next to Clarke. She lies awake for some time, staring at the ceiling. She is worried about her friend; Clarke has always been the strong one. Even when she had broken up with Finn, she had been stoic about it, although rather unpleasant for a few months. Seeing her like this is strange for Raven, and she hates that there is only so much she could do to help her. If she could track this girl down for her, she would, but her computer skills are no use without a full name or some other hint as to who Lexa is. She hopes that this girl, whoever she is, finds Clarke soon.

 

***

 

Lexa does not know what to think anymore. She is sitting in front of her computer, trying to get some work done, but, as usual, her mind keeps wandering back to Clarke. She has tried to find her, and failed. This means one of two things: Clarke does not want to be found (she can’t blame her, not after how she treated her), or it was simply not meant to be. Anya keeps telling her that she should keep looking for Clarke, but Lexa is not sure she wants to anymore. This whole experience has been draining for her, mentally and emotionally. She has trouble concentrating in class, and her assignments’ quality has been significantly diminished. Even her professors have noticed. She is usually meticulous; it is unusual to see her handing in half-finished assignments.

Lexa decides that if it is meant to be, she and Clarke will meet again. But she wants to try one more thing before she leaves everything to fate. She closes the assignment she had been trying to work on and opens Google. She thinks back to the rude man who had interrupted her and Clarke at the art gallery. He had called her Clarke Griffin. Lexa remembers, because she had made careful not of everything about Clarke, and her name stuck out to her. A griffin is a mythological creature with a lion’s body and an eagle’s head and wings. They are known for guarding treasure. It had seemed fitting to Lexa at the time, seeing Clarke Griffin standing in front of her beautiful paintings as if she were guarding them.

Lexa gathers her courage and carefully types “Clarke Griffin” in the search bar. She scrolls through the results: a law group, a Facebook profile of a girl who looks nothing like Clarke, and towards the bottom of the page: _Clarke Griffin, Artist_. Lexa’s is fairly certain her heart stops as she clicks on the website. There, she finds various pictures of Clarke’s paintings, dates of upcoming expositions in art galleries, and, lo and behold, a phone number. Lexa can feel her brain go numb. Without thinking, she pulls out her phone number and rapidly dials the numbers. She instantly regrets her decision: she should take the time to think about what she wants to say. But the phone is already ringing and she cannot bring herself to hang up.

“Hello?”

Lexa gulps. That is, without a doubt, Clarke’s voice. She hates to admit it, but she has missed the sound of it. Lexa cringes, trying to think of something to say.

“Hello?” Clarke asks again, a little louder.

Lexa’s courage falters. “Yes, hello. Is this Clarke Griffin?”

“Yes, that’s me… Do I know you? Your voice sounds familiar.”

“No, I don’t think so; I am interested in buying one of your paintings.” Lexa smacks herself once the sentence is out of her mouth.

“Alright. Which one are you interested in?”

Lexa looks down at Clarke’s website. “The one of the deer.”

There is a slight pause. “You are aware that that one costs 1000$?”

“Yes.”

 “Would you like to have the painting delivered, or so you want to pick it up in person?”

Lexa pauses. “Delivery, please.” This way, she won’t have to see Clarke, it would be too embarrassing.

“Ok. What will the mode of payment be?”

Lexa panics. She doesn’t have the money to pay for the painting. Why did she get herself into this? “Credit card.”

 “In that case, would you like to give me your credit card number now, and I can have the painting delivered tomorrow?”

Lexa starts to panic. “One moment please.” She stumbles out of her room and barges into Anya’s. She covers the receiver with her hand.

“Anya, I need you to do me a really big favor.”

Anya looks up at her sister quizzically. “And what would that be?”

“I need you to lend me your credit card for a minute.”

“What for?” Anya asks, an eyebrow raised.

“To buy a 1000$ painting.” When Anya’s eyebrows shoot up past her hairline, Lexa adds: “It’s Clarke’s.”

Lexa sees Anya processing the information in her head. She stares at her older sister with eyes that could melt the heart of even the most hardened criminal. Anya finally gives in and pulls out her wallet, handing her credit card to Lexa with a glare that says _you owe me one_.

 

***

 

Clarke carefully wraps her painting and places it in the back of her car. She will be sad to see this painting go; it was one of her favorites. But it was also her most expensive one, and she is glad to have the extra money. She thinks back to the phone conversation she had with the buyer the previous day. Her voice sounded very familiar, but she hadn’t been able to place it. It was a very strange and formal conversation, and the very long pause before the buyer gave her credit card number perplexes Clarke. She tries not to overthink it; the card was accepted, Clarke has her money and that should be the only thing that matters.

As she drives, Clarke takes in the beautiful weather. Spring is finally turning into summer, and the trees are blossoming. Clarke takes the time to enjoy the feeling of the sun on her face and turns on the radio. She has sung along to four and a half songs when her GPS indicated that she has arrived at her destination. She pulls into a small parking lot and takes her painting out of her car. She checks the apartment number in the entrance of the building and groans when she sees that it’s on the third floor. And of course, there is no elevator.

Clarke picks up her painting and slowly makes her way up the stairs. She is out of breath by the first landing, she is sweating by the second, and she is fairly certain she has some sort of heart condition by the time she makes it to the third. She props the painting up against the wall next to the door of apartment and knocks. She hears footsteps approaching and the door opens. Clarke can’t believe her eyes.

“Lexa?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have exams coming up, so the next chapter probably won't be published for a while.  
> In fact, I'm not certain I will write more to this story, so if you want more, you can leave a comment here or send me a message on Tumblr. If I see that the demand is there, I will write more for sure :)


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Due to the great response I received after my last chapter, I have decided to continue writing this story. Sorry for the delay, and here is a slighly longer chapter to make up for it.  
> Come say hi: misslymiss.tumblr.com

“Clarke, I didn’t know you would be delivering this personally.”

Lexa slips her hands in her pockets and avoids Clarke’s gaze. She had assumed that having the painting delivered would avoid the embarrassment of having to face Clarke. She had been wrong.

“You bought a 1000$ painting, damn right I’m delivering it personally.”

“Ah yes, well you have my sister to thank for that; she is the one who paid.”

The pieces of the puzzle start to piece themselves together in Clarke’s head. This was why she recognized the voice on the phone. How silly she was for not having known it belonged to Lexa; only Lexa’s voice combines silky and sultry so perfectly.

The two of them stand there awkwardly, Clarke still out of breath from climbing up to the third floor with her heavy painting, and Lexa leaning uncomfortably against the doorway. Lexa finally breaks the silence.

“Clarke, about the other day at the art gallery-”

Clarke doesn’t let her finish. After losing Lexa twice, she had made herself a promise: if she ever saw Lexa again, she would make sure they stayed in each other’s lives. Clarke likes Lexa very much, and she is attracted to her, but she respects Lexa’s boundaries. And Lexa has made it clear that she isn’t interested in anything romantic. Clarke is willing to respect that; she would rather be in Lexa’s life as a friend than never see her again.

“Lexa, it’s ok. I understand.”

Lexa’s shoulders droop and she sighs. “Really?”

“Yes,” Clarke answers firmly. “And I’ve thought about it, and I really just want us to be friends.”

Lexa’s shoulders tense up again. _Of course_ , she tells herself. _She is not interested anymore_. She should have known that running away like that would push her away. But Clarke still seems interested in staying friends, and she is willing to settle for that.

“Would you like to come in, Clarke?”

Clarke nods and Lexa steps aside from the door. Clarke follows her inside, her painting tucked under her arm. The apartment is small, but cozy. It’s not the kind of place she would have imagined Lexa living in. But then again, she figures that her sister must have decorated. The walls are painted a warm shade of yellow and are covered with pictures. Clarke approaches one of Lexa as a child, smiling up at the camera. Her two front teeth are missing and her nose is dusted with freckles. Clarke can’t help but smile at the young and carefree child that Lexa used to be. She wonders what happened to make her so guarded.

“So, where do you want to hang this up?” Clarke asks, gesturing to the walls.

“In my room.” Lexa gestures and turns towards the door at the end of the corridor. Clarke follows her and smiles when she enters the room. This looks more like what she had imagined Lexa living in: an airy, organized, modern room in shades of black and white. A dash of red catches Clarke’s attention and she turns towards the red pillow on the bed.

“Nice pillow,” Clarke comments with a ghost of a smile on her lips.

Lexa turns towards the pillow and smiles. “Anya gave it to me. She said there wasn’t enough color in my room.”

Clarke nods; she can see Anya’s point. “Lexa, this painting is pretty colorful. You sure you want it in here?”

“Yes.” Lexa answers, and the finality in her tone is enough to convince Clarke to hang the painting up on the nail that Lexa has installed. After making sure that it is solid, Clarke lets herself fall on Lexa’s bed and closes her eyes. If it was anyone else, Lexa would have minded, but the sight of Clarke on her bed is enough to make her feel heat creeping up her cheeks.

Clarke opens one eye and asks: “So, how did you find me?”

Lexa is taken aback. “I beg your pardon?”

“How did you find me? I mean, how did you get my phone number?”

Lexa shifts her weight from foot to foot. “Oh, um… I stumbled across your website.”

Clarke sits up and grins. “You mean you Googled me?”

Lexa starts to blush and Clarke laughs. “Relax, it’s ok. I’ve done my fair share of internet stalking. I probably would have looked you up if I knew your full name… Speaking of which, what is it?”

Lexa smiles shyly. “Well that would be too easy, wouldn’t it? I would lose all of my mystery.”

Clarke rolls her eyes and smiles. “Ok then,” she challenges and gets up from the bed. She strolls over to Lexa’s desk, looking for an envelope or a piece of paper that might help her elucidate the mystery. However, the desk is completely bare, except for a laptop and a lamp. Clarke thinks of opening the drawer underneath the desk, but decides against it. She doesn’t want to make Lexa uncomfortable, and she has a feeling that her privacy is important to her. Instead, Clarke makes her way over to the bookcase and inspects its contents.

“What the hell is this thing?” Clarke asks, pulling out a book as thick as a brick, and weighing five times as much.

“Oh, that’s the Campbell,” Lexa beams, her eyes lighting up. “It’s a great reference book for biology.”

Clarke makes a face at the word _biology_. She always hated science in school. She dropped everything science-related as soon as it was no longer mandatory. “Oh, so you’re a student?” When Lexa nods, Clarke tries to put the book back carefully, but manages to half drop it. She scrambles to catch it and shoots Lexa an apologetic smile. “You’re studying biology?”

“Yes, I’m getting a degree in biology.I’m really interested in science and nature.”

“So what kind of jobs can you get with a biology degree?”

“Well you can work in a lab, or on the field. I’m interested in going out on the field and doing research. My ultimate goal would be to find a way to reverse global warming… or slow it down at the very least. That must sound silly to you.” Lexa looks down, embarrassed at having shared so much. She is usually so guarded, but there is something about Clarke that makes her want to share everything.

Clarke turns to face Lexa and reaches to take her hand, but thinks the better of it. “It sounds amazing, Lexa. If anyone is going to do it, it’s going to be you, I’m sure of it.”

Lexa smiles gratefully at Clarke and turns to sit on her bed. Clarke joins her a few moments later. “So have you finished your term yet?”

“No, I actually have one exam left, on Friday. Then, I’ll be done for the summer.”

“Friday…” Clarke squints her eyes as she thinks. “Hey, Raven -my roommate- and I are having some friends over on Friday night. You should come!”

Lexa takes a moment to consider the proposition. She would really like to spend more time with Clarke, but the thought of meeting her friends is intimidating to her. She decides to come up with an excuse.

“Oh, I actually have a friend who promised to take me out on Friday night to celebrate. I wouldn’t want to let him down.”

Clarke looks disappointed for a moment, and Lexa feels guilt rush through her, but the blonde lights up a moment later.

“You should bring him!”

Lexa, unable to think of another excuse (and not sure she wants to either), smiles and nods. “Alright.”

Clarke breaks into a large grin. “Ok then! Here, I’ll write down my address for you. You can come by at 7:00, does that sound good?”

Lexa nods and glances at the piece of paper Clarke hands her. The address is the same as the one where she first met her. She thinks back to the day she went looking for her there and left when a stranger opened the door. _It must have been one of her friends_ , she thinks, kicking herself for having run away so easily.

Her thought process is interrupted by the sound of jangling keys and the front door swinging open. Lexa stands up quickly and pokes her head out of her bedroom door.

“Hi Anya, Clarke is just here delivering the painting.” Lexa steps back and lets her sister in her room.

Clarke stands from where she was still sitting on the bed and offers her hand to Anya, who gives her a good look before extending her own hand and shaking it.

“It’s nice to meet you, Anya.”

Anya grunts and turns towards the painting, examining it carefully.

“It’s nice,” she finally admits. “It will add some much needed color to your room, Lexa.” Both Lexa and Clarke smile at this.

After an awkward pause, Clarke takes a step towards the door and sighs. “Well, I should probably get going.”

Lexa takes a step towards her. “Alright, I’ll walk you to the door.”

“Oh no, it’s fine, really. I’ll see you on Friday?”

Lexa nods, and Clarke smiles before leaving. After hearing the front door close, Lexa glares at her sister. “You could have been nicer to her.”

Anya shrugs. “She’s pretty. I hope that 1000$ I spent at least got you a date.”

Lexa turns towards her sister with wide, pleading eyes. “Well, not exactly. But I’m seeing her on Friday. Speaking of which, I have to call Lincoln.”

Anya frowns, her eyes asking her sister a silent question.

“It’s a long story,” is all the explanation Lexa offers as she pulls out her phone and dials.

“Hi Lincoln, it’s Lexa. What are you doing on Friday night? I need a favor.”

 

***

 

Lexa is standing in front of Lexa’s door at seven o’clock on the dot. Her apprehension makes her shift her weight from foot to foot as she stares at the door. She is excited and nervous to see Clarke again. She is also nervous about meeting Clarke’s friends; she has never been very good in social situations. She turns towards Lincoln and he responds to the uncertainty in her eyes with a nod and a smile.

“You knock, Lincoln. I don’t think I can do it.”

Lincoln tries to repress a smile. “Come on, Lexa. You’re the strongest person I know. You can definitely do it.”

It’s enough to appeal to Lexa’s ego, and she raises her arm and knocks on the door firmly, three times. She lets out the breath she was holding when a smiling Clarke answers the door.

“Hi Lexa! I did pin you for a punctual person,” she comments as she lets them in.

Lexa follows Clarke inside and motions to Lincoln. “Clarke, this is Lincoln.”

“Nice to meet you,” she smiles, offering her hand.

He shakes it, reciprocating the smile. “The pleasure is mine.”

“You guys are the first ones here. Would you like something to drink?”

“I’ll have what you are having,” Lexa answers, barely letting show how nervous she is feeling, which is quite a feat because she thinks she may faint on the spot. She is not usually one to drink much, but she welcomes the opportunity to loosen up a little around Clarke and her friends.

Lincoln hands Clarke the bottle of wine he is holding. “Here, we brought this. I won’t be drinking though; I’m driving.”

Clarke accepts the bottle and thanks Lincoln before pouring two beers into red solo cups. She hands one to Lexa with a rueful smile.

“Not the classiest glasses, I know, but Bellamy broke all the decent ones we have.”

“He can’t be trusted with anything fragile,” a voice comments from the top of the stairs. “Hi, I’m Raven by the way,” she adds as she makes her way down the stairs.

Clarke smiles at her friend and gestures towards their guests. “Raven, this is Lexa and Lincoln.”

Raven smiles at them and pours herself a beer. “So you’re the famous Lexa that Clarke has told me all about.”

Clarke opens her mouth to defend herself, but they are interrupted by Octavia swinging open the door and barging it without knocking. She makes it a few steps before she notices Lincoln and stops in her tracks. Her mouth opens in surprise and she turns to Clarke, her questioning eyes demanding an explanation.

“Octavia, this is Lexa and Lincoln.”

Octavia smiles and saunters over to the kitchen. She puts the six-pack of beer she is holding down on the counter. She yanks one free, opens it and takes a few gulps directly from the can before examining the pair standing in front of her.

“So, are you two… dating?” she asks, gesturing to Lexa and Lincoln.

Lincoln bursts into laughter Lexa tries to hide a smile. “No, we are definitely not dating.”

“We actually dated for a week in high school, but it turns out that she is very gay,” Lincoln chuckles as he looks at Lexa fondly. She blushes and swats his arm. Clarke and Raven exchange a quick, meaningful glance. Clarke had already deduced that Lexa was interested in women from her phone conversation with Anya, but this confirmation makes the butterflies in her stomach come to life. She tries to settle them down with a few gulps from her cup. She can’t afford to think of Lexa in a romantic way, since the feeling is obviously not reciprocated.

Jasper, Monty and Bellamy arrive a few minutes later. After all the introductions are made and the drinks are poured, Octavia approaches Clarke.

“Hey, Lexa’s cute,” she remarks with a smile.

Clarke hums in agreement. “We’ve agree to be just friends, though.”

Octavia pauses, and tilts her head. “Would you happen to know if her friend Lincoln is single?”

“Sorry O, I have no idea. I just met him.”

“Do you think you could ask Lexa for me?” she pleads, wringing her hands and looking at Clarke with the eyes of a wounded puppy.

“Ok, but you owe me one,” Clarke sighs, which earns her a squeal and a hug from Octavia.

Lexa is standing in the corner of the room, clutching her cup and looking uncertainly around her. Lincoln is standing next to her, talking to her calmly. Lexa nods every once in a while at what he says, but she does not seem appeased. She smiles when she sees Clarke approaching.

“Hi Clarke,” she breathes, barely concealing her relief.

“Hi. Lincoln, could you please give us a moment?”

Lincoln nods and moves away, leaving Lexa looking at Clarke inquiringly.

“Octavia wants to know if Lincoln is single,” Clarke explains, gesturing in the direction on her friend. Octavia is in the kitchen, tapping her fingers nervously against the edge of her beer can. When she sees Clarke motioning towards her, she glares at her friend and shakes her head.

“I mean, uh… a friend wants to know if Lincoln is single,” Clarke corrects, grinning at Lexa.

Lexa smiles back. “As far as I know, yes.”

Clarke nods and gives a thumbs up in Octavia’s direction. Octavia immediately makes her way towards Lincoln, smiling up at him and giving him her best seduction eyes. Clarke turns back towards Lexa and smiles shrewdly.

“Sorry, I don’t think you’ll be seeing much of him for the rest of the night. Here, why don’t you talk you Jasper and Monty over here? They’re really nice, I think you’ll like them,” Clarke offers, leading Lexa to her friends, and slipping away discreetly once Lexa seems comfortable.

Jasper gives Lexa an awkward wave. “Hey, so I’m the idiot who didn’t realize you were looking for Clarke the other day.”

“Oh, that’s all right. It was silly of me to have assumed I had the wrong address simply because she didn’t answer the door.”

Lexa doesn’t know what to do with her hands, so she takes a sip from her cup.

Monty smiles and interjects: “Hey, well it all turned out all right, didn’t it?”

Lexa forces herself to smile. It hasn’t worked out exactly the way she had wanted it to, but she is glad to have Clarke as a friend nonetheless. She tries to guide the conversation away from herself.

“So, how did you to meet?”

Jasper turns to Monty; he is always the one who answers this question. Jasper got bored of it after a while, but Monty never tires of telling the story.

“We met on the first day of kindergarten. I lost my toy in the sandbox and Jasper helped me find it. He dug a hole all the way to the bottom of the sandbox for me, although it turned out that the toy was in my pocket all along. We’ve been best friends ever since. We started dating a few months ago and never looked back.”

Lexa smiles. Stories of childhood friendship and finding love never fail to make her feel fuzzy and warm inside. It’s her weakness, but she would never tell anyone that.

“That is a lovely story.”

Monty grins as he slides is backpack off.

“And one of our traditions…” he starts, pulling a game of Twister out of his bag.

“Who’s up for a game of Twister?” he asks eagerly. Octavia and Lincoln, who are deep in conversation, ignore him completely. Bellamy shakes his heading, mumbling something along the lines of “never again”.

Lexa looks around uncertainly for an excuse not to participate. “I’m not sure I…”

“Oh come on, Lexa. It’ll be fun!” Clarke exclaims, taking Lexa’s hand and dragging her towards the mat Monty has sprawled on the floor. The fact that Lexa has had a bit to drink, but mostly the fact that her hand is in Clarke’s clouds her judgement, and she lets herself be convinced into participating.

Raven offers to do the spinning, as Jasper, Monty, Clarke and Lexa take of their shoes. The game begins, and Lexa’s competitive streak makes her a fierce adversary. That, and the fact that she is determined to impress Clarke. Clarke also takes the game very seriously, contorting her face to keep her balance and making every move very carefully. Monty and Jasper don’t take the game too seriously, and end up falling one on top of the other in a fit of giggles, which leaves only Clarke and Lexa. Neither of them notices the glint in Raven’s eye as she completely disregards the spinner and starts concocting a plan.

“Right foot blue. Left hand red. Right hand yellow. Right hand green. Left foot green.”

Eventually, Clarke finds herself on top of Lexa in a very suggestive position. Raven smiles with satisfaction as she watches them both blush with embarrassment. Lexa grits her teeth, refusing to back down. But her closeness to Clarke makes her mind foggy, and she is intoxicated by her presence, her scent. Clarke is equally as infatuated, looking down into Lexa’s deep green eyes and feeling the warmth of her beneath her. Neither of them notices when Raven stops giving them orders, and they stay pressed together for some time until finally Clarke peels herself away from Lexa, giggling shyly.

“Well, that was fun.”

Lexa stands up and dusts off her pants, clearing her throat. “Yes, it was amusing.”

Clarke turns to find everyone staring at them. She thinks back to the position they were just in and feels color creep up her cheeks. “So, are you guys up for a movie?” she asks, hoping to avoid the inappropriate comments that are sure to ensue unless she does something, and fast. She makes her way to the television and rummages through the DVDs, pulling out the first one she finds.

“How do you guys feel about…” she looks down at the DVD in her hands “Shrek?”

Monty yelps in delight and propels himself onto the couch. The rest make their way to the living room and settling themselves down. Lexa sits down on the edge of the couch and pulls her knees against her body, cradling her cup between her hands. She has lost track of how many she has had, and her mind is going fuzzy. She notices Lincoln and Octavia squeezing together into a very small armchair and tries to feel happy for her friend. She can’t help but feel a twinge of jealousy; she has had such bad luck when it comes to dating lately.

Clarke settles down next to Lexa and presses play. Lexa half-watches the movie and tries not to notice the way Clarke’s arm is brushing against her leg. She would never admit it, but she loves Shrek, and the last thing she mumbles before falling asleep on Clarke’s couch is “That is a nice boulder.”

 

***

 

When Lexa wakes up, her mouth is so dry she can only compare it to sandpaper. She keeps her eyes closed for a moment, taking in the feeling of being well rested and ignoring the pounding in her head. It is only after a moment that it dawns on her that she is lying on something rather less comfortable than her bed that her eyes shoot open. She is blinded by the light for a moment, and when her eyes adjust, she recognizes Clarke’s living room. She bolts upright, eyes searching wildly around the room. She spots a glass of water and two advils on the coffee table in front of her. She takes the note peeking out from under the glass and reads it.

_Hope you’re feeling ok this morning. If not, advils are great for hangovers. I’ll be upstairs, you can come get me when you wake up._

_-C_

Lexa pops the advils in her mouth and gulps down the glass of water. She hates the idea of going upstairs and disturbing Clarke, so she decides to slip out quietly. She grabs her jacket and tiptoes to the door. She is obviously not as quiet as she thinks she is, because she is startled by the sound of someone walking down the stairs. Lexa turns around guiltily and finds Clarke facing her, her arms crossed.

“Going somewhere?”

Lexa stutters, trying to formulate a coherent sentence. “I… uh… I didn’t…”

Clarke smiles and gives Lexa an affectionate smack on the arm. “Hey, it’s ok. You didn’t want to disturb me. But consider me disturbed, so come have breakfast with me.”

Lexa shakes her head. “I’ve already overstepped…”

Clarke doesn’t let her finish and takes Lexa’s hand gently, leading her into the kitchen.

“So, what do you want? I have toast, eggs, bacon…” Clarke peers into the fridge, looking at her options.

“At least let me prepare something for us,” Lexa insists, opening the door to the fridge a little wider.

Clarke steps aside and sits on a stool. “Fine.”

“Will Raven be joining us?” Lexa asks, without turning towards Clarke.

“No, she already left for work.”

Lexa starts pulling out eggs, milk and flour out of the fridge and starts mixing ingredients. Whenever she can’t find something, Clarke points to a cupboard or a drawer. She tries getting up and helping her, but Lexa scolds her and assures her that she doesn’t need help. Clarke doesn’t complain and, if she’s being honest, she like being able to watch Lexa while she is engrossed in cooking. She takes in her prefect profile, her full lips and her messy hair. Clarke marvels at how beautiful Lexa is, despite having just woken up.

Fifteen minutes later, Lexa has is holding two plates of pancakes. They sit across from each other and Clarke pours an outrageous amount of maple syrup on her pancakes. Lexa raises an eyebrow, but makes no comment. She takes a few mouthfuls before she speaks.

“Why didn’t you wake me up last night?”

Clarke finishes the very large mouthful she just took. “You looked so peaceful… And your lift left without you, so I figured you could stay the night.”

Lexa furrows her brow. “Why did Lincoln leave without me?”

Clarke clears her throat and has the decency to look embarrassed. “Uh… He sort of left with Octavia. They really hit it off, you know.”

Lexa nods and looks down at her plate, resolving to call Lincoln later to scold him. If he hadn’t left with Octavia, she would have been spared the embarrassment of overstaying her welcome with Clarke.

Clarke finishes her plate at an astonishing speed and put down her utensils with a sigh.

“Hey, since I don’t work until tonight, and you’re on vacation, we should hang out today.”

Lexa nods slowly. She doesn’t know what Clarke has in mind, but she is willing to go along with whatever she suggests.

Clarke gets up and starts cleaning the dishes as Lexa finishes her plate. “Alright, I know just the place.”

Five minutes later, they are walking out of Clarke’s apartment. Clarke hasn’t told Lexa where they are going. Although Lexa hates surprises, she thinks she would follow Clarke to the ends of the world. As they step outside, both of them look up at the ominous grey clouds floating above their heads.

“Wow, I didn’t notice those from inside,” Clarke comments, looking worried. “I hope it doesn’t rain, our surprise destination is outside.”

Lexa shrugs and follows Clarke down the sidewalk. They walk in silence, and Lexa is acutely aware of Clarke’s hand brushing against her own. Every touch sends a shiver down her spine, and she tries to ignore it. When she feels that she might burst, she reaches out and takes Clarke’s hand in her own. Friends do that, right? Clarke doesn’t react and they continue their journey.

The park Clarke has in mind is not very far. She loves going there at this time of year; the color of the leaves at this time of year is without compare. The apple trees are starting to blossom and the pond is filled with ducks and their ducklings. Children are running around, chasing the birds, blowing bubbles and squealing with delight. Clarke and Lexa sit down on a bench near the pond and finally disengage their locked hands.

“I love coming here to draw,” Clarke sighs.

Lexa takes in the beauty of the park and smiles. “It’s beautiful.”

Clarke loves having someone who can see beauty and appreciate it. Seeing the amazement in Lexa’s eyes is enough to make Clarke’s heart tighten in her chest. She wishes she could draw Lexa in this moment, and she takes a mental picture of her, resolving to draw her later.

Not long after, the raindrops start falling from the sky. They are large, cold drops that sting as they make contact with the skin. Clarke yelps as one catches her in the back of the neck.

“We’re heading back. Run!”

Lexa is a fast runner, and she sprints back towards Clarke’s apartment. She turns around after a few strides and finds Clarke lagging behind. She slows, letting Clarke catch up and jogs alongside her. She usually likes races, but she can make an exception just this once.

When they make it back to Clarke’s apartment, their clothes are completely soaked. Lexa would probably collapse on the couch, if she weren’t afraid of ruining it with her wet clothes. Clarke takes a moment to recover, catching her breath before leading Lexa upstairs. Clarke starts rummaging through her drawers as Lexa takes in the blonde’s room.

The room is filled with a mess bigger than Lexa would have thought such a small room could contain. There are dirty clothes scattered across every inch of the room, and Lexa is fairly certain she can see an old box of leftover takeout peeking out from under a dirty t-shirt. She thinks that the room could be nice, if it were cleaned up a little. The bedspread is a vibrant hue of blue, and the walls are covered with various posters.

Clarke finally pulls out an oversized t-shirt and some shorts and hands them to Lexa.

“Here, put these on. The bathroom is down the hall.”

Lexa accepts the clothes with a small smile and makes her way to the bathroom. After the door is locked behind her, she leans against it and lets herself slide to the ground. She hasn’t had time to sort through her feelings since yesterday, and she has a lot to think about. The main thing that concerns her is how she feels around Clarke. It feels as if they have known each other for ever, yet she feels as if she might melt every time they interact.

 _I barely know her_ , she reminds herself, although it feels like she does. She doesn’t know her favorite color, or the name of her childhood pet, but she _knows_ her. She sees her soul, and she feels that she and Clarke understand each other on a deeper level. If she believed in soulmates, or in love at first sight, she might even have gone as far as to call her that. But Lexa is a practical person, and her feelings for Clarke are nothing more than an inconvenience. She will have to gain control over her emotions if she wants a chance to remain Clarke’s friend. She wouldn’t want to ruin their blossoming friendship by making unwanted advances.

Lexa peels of her wet clothes and slips into the ones Clarke has lent her. She is ashamed to admit it to herself, but she loves the way they smell; they smell of Clarke. Lexa brings the fabric to her face and breathes in deeply before pulling herself together and joining Clarke downstairs.

Lexa tries not to gape at the very short shorts that Clarke has changed into, and successfully joins her without tripping. Clarke huddles onto the couch and hands Lexa a controller.

“Do you like video games?”

Lexa grins, and Clarke thinks that that may be the most beautiful thing she has ever seen.

“Yes, I do enjoy them very much.”

“Good, then get ready to get your ass kicked at Halo.”

As it turns out, Lexa is very good at video games. Anya introduced them to her when she was younger. It had started with Lexa being inseparable from her Nintendogs, and had moved on to her love for Assassin’s Creed, Mass Effect and Halo.

After losing count of how many rounds she has lost, Clarke pushes the pause button and flings her controller on the couch.

“Jeez, Lexa. Give a girl a warning.”

Lexa smiles and carefully places her controller on the table. She extends her arms over her head and stretches, surprised by the sound of her stomach growling. She checks the clock and is astounded to find that they have been playing for several hours. Clarke turns to the sound of Lexa’s rumbling stomach and checks the time.

“Ok, I’m ordering some pizza.”

 

***

 

The empty box of pizza is lying on the table, and  Clarke and Lexa are huddled together on the couch, sharing a bowl of popcorn and watching _The Notebook_. Lexa reaches out for the box of tissues and wipes away a tear. Clarke is fighting back tears of her own, but that doesn’t stop her from seizing the opportunity to tease Lexa.

“Wow, so you’re actually a softie,” she manages to croak out without letting a tear spill from her water-filled eyes.

Lexa elbows her, but refrains from answering with a witty comeback, not trusting her voice. Instead, she opts to shove her hand in the popcorn bowl, where it brushes against Clarke’s. Lexa is disgusted at herself for the cliché butterflies in her stomach when their hands brush together. She ignores them and grabs a handful of popcorn, stuffing it in her mouth.

The end credits roll across the screen and Clarke stifles a sob. “Whose terrible idea was it to watch this?”

“Yours,” Lexa retorts.

“Right.”

Clarke watches the girl sitting on her couch with a tear rolling down her cheek and she feels like her chest might explode. Before she has time to think, she reaches out and wipes away the tear, earning her a watery smile from Lexa.

Clarke checks her phone for the time and sighs. “I have to get to work soon.”

“Where do you work?” Lexa asks curiously. “I went back to the bar where I lost my phone, but you weren’t there,” she adds, omitting the fact that she had gone there with the purpose of finding her.

“Oh yeah, I got fired from there. I work at another bar now, not too far from there. I would offer to bring you with me, but it wouldn’t be much fun for you; I have my hands full with bartending.”

Lexa shakes her head. “Oh no, that’s quite alright. I should probably go in any case.”

Clarke has been so hospitable, Lexa is worried she is overstaying her welcome. She stands and looks down at the clothes Clarke has lent her.

“I’ll get changed into my own clothes and get out of your way,” she offers, walking up the stairs before Clarke can protest that she _isn’t_ in her way, and that she enjoys her company.

Lexa finds her clothes completely dry, which is disappointing. She had been hoping to have an excuse to keep Clarke’s clothes. She runs her hands over the soft fabric of Clarke’s shirt, and an idea dawns on her. She slips on her own pants and runs her own shirt under the tap briefly. She makes her way downstairs, still wearing Clarke’s shirt, and holding her own damp shirt in her hands.

“My shirt is still wet,” she lies convincingly.

“Oh you can keep mine, it’s no trouble. It looks nicer on you than it does on my, anyways.”

Lexa blushes and smiles, tucking a loose strand of hair behind her ear. “Thank you.”

“How will you be getting back home? I know Lincoln was supposed to be your lift.”

“I can take the bus,” Lexa answers weakly. She doesn’t have her pass, or any money for that matter, but she doesn’t want to bother Clarke, who has already been so hospitable. She holds Clarke’s gaze, daring her to defy her.

“Do you even have your bus pass?” Clarke asks with a sigh.

“No, but-” Lexa tries to protest.

“I’m driving you.”

“It’s fine, I can take the bus. I don’t want to make you late.”

“It’s no trouble, it’s not far,” Clarke counters, leading a protesting Lexa to her car.

Clarke settles into the front seat of her old Volkswagen and quickly clears out the trash from the passenger seat before Lexa slips in next to her. Clarke offers her a quick smile before she starts the car and pulls out of the driveway and onto the busy street. She hasn’t set her GPS, since she knows where she is going, but she worries that Lexa will find her strange for remembering where she lives.

Since Lexa doesn’t look like she wants to start a conversation, Clarke turns on the radio to fill the silence. _Worth it_ by Fifth Harmony comes on and Clarke tries to contain her enthusiasm, but without much success.

“God, I love this song,” she finally blurts out before starting to sing along.

 _Uh huh you see me in the spotlight_  
"Ooh I love your style"  
Uh huh show me what you got  
Cause I don't wanna waste my time  
Uh huh see me in the spotlight  
"Ooh I love your style"  
Uh huh show me what you got now  
Come and make it worth my while

Lexa smiles at Clarke’s enthusiasm, and she has to admit that Clarke has a nice voice. She finds her foot tapping to the beat of the song and her head bobbing slightly from side to side. Clarke notices and grins widely before jumping into the chorus.

 _Give it to me, I'm worth it_  
Baby, I'm worth it  
Uh huh I'm worth it  
Gimme gimme I'm worth it  
Give it to me, I'm worth it  
Baby, I'm worth it  
Uh huh I'm worth it  
Gimme gimme I'm worth it

Clarke sings along to every single song that pops up on the radio, and Lexa is amazed at her ability to remember the lyrics to so many songs. While Clarke is focused on the road, Lexa seizes the opportunity to glance at her perfect profile, at the way her fingers tap along to the beat of the music on the steering wheel and at the way she changes gears so effortlessly. Lexa has always wanted to learn to drive a manual car, but has never had the opportunity. The car that she shares with Anya is an automatic, and she barely gets to drive it as it is.

Clarke turns down the radio as they approach their destination.

“What was the address again?”

She knows exactly where it is, but she waits for Lexa to point to the building before pulling over. Once the car is stopped, Lexa turns to Clarke.

“Thank you for driving me.”

“No problem. We should hang out again soon; I had a lot of fun today.”

Lexa nods and glances down at Clarke’s lips. They are so inviting, she feels as if she might die if she doesn’t kiss her. But she knows she shouldn’t. Clarke wants to be friends and Lexa doesn’t want to ruin that. She hasn’t had many friends in her life, and she doesn’t want to lose Clarke. But the way Clarke’s lips are calling to her makes her weak. _Don’t do it Lexa_ , the rational part of her mind warns.

She ignores it.

Lexa leans forward and stops mere inches before reaching Clarke’s lips. Her eyes flutter shut and she takes a deep, shuddering breath. She is so close that she can feel Clarke’s breath on her mouth. But before Clarke has time to respond and close the gap between their lips, Lexa’s eyes shoot open and she pulls away from Clarke, horrified.

“I’m so sorry,” she chokes out before scrambling out of the car and running off, leaving behind a flustered and dumbfounded Clarke.


	4. Chapter 4

Clarke, Raven and Octavia meet for lunch on Sunday, as they do every week. It’s a tradition they have had for years, although none of them could tell exactly when it started. No matter how busy they are, they always take the time to meet and catch up on each other’s lives.

The three of them stand on the sidewalk arguing for some time before finally settling on a small restaurant with a large red sign, dark wooden floors and comfortable-looking chairs. They settle down and make their orders.

Clarke props her elbows on the table. “Rave, how was work yesterday?”

“Not bad. Someone brought in a really nice car for us to repair, and it takes all my self-restraint not to take it out for a joyride.”

“Raven!” Octavia gasps, feigning offense.

“You wouldn’t understand, Mrs. Personal Trainer,” Raven scoffs.

Octavia huffs. “Well, when I get a hot guy totally cut after a few months of training, it’s hard to resist taking him out on a _joyride_ ,” Octavia teases, offering Raven a wink.

Raven rolls her eyes and Clarke finally gives in to her curiosity.

“So Octavia, tell us about Lincoln.”

Octavia’s eyes light up, and neither of them notices the flash of annoyance in Raven’s eyes.

“He’s great! He’s strong, but gentle, and he’s kind and attentive…” Octavia drifts off and stares into the distance. Raven gives her a small nudge.

“Uh, hello? You just met him! I can’t believe you just left with him the other night.”

Octavia turns towards Raven defensively. “I can’t believe you of all people would say that!”

“What the hell are you talking about?” Raven asks, offended.

“You and Bellamy hooked up within days of knowing each other!”

“That was different-“

At that moment, Clarke intervenes. “Ok guys, take it down a notch. What’s going on with you two?”

“Just trying to protect my friend from having her heart broken again,” Raven grumbles.

Octavia rolls her eyes. “I can take care of myself.”

There is a pause where they glare at each other before they both break into a grin and lean in to hug each other.

“I’m sorry,” Raven sighs in Octavia’s hair. Octavia hums into Raven’s neck and gives her a squeeze before they pull apart. The two of them rarely fight, but when they do, they can never be angry at each other for long. Clarke smiles at them amusedly. She has witnessed their fights before, and is always amazed at how fast they reconcile. She is the kind of person who holds a grudge, so it is hard for her to imagine being able to forgive someone so easily.

Raven turns towards Clarke and crosses her arms with a smirk. “Hey Clarke, you’re not off the hook. I saw that Lexa stayed the night on Friday.”

Octavia’s jaw drops. “She did?”

“She slept on the couch because _someone_ left with her lift.” Clarke teases.

Octavia gives Clarke an embarrassed smile. “Sorry.”

“It’s fine. We spent the day together yesterday. We went for a walk, she kicked my ass at video games and we watched a movie. It was really nice.” Clarke smiles contentedly at the memory of the previous day.

Raven perks up. “And…?”

“And that’s it,” Clarke sighs. “I mean, I drove her back to her place and she almost kissed me in the car, but she ran away.”

“She WHAT?” Octavia gasps.

“Yeah, I mean she leaned in and everything, but then she just ran,” Clarke explains.

Reliving the moment brings up mixed emotions for Clarke. The relief that Lexa was interested in her. The excitement of seeing Lexa leaning in and the anticipation of finally feeling her lips on her own. And the disappointment of seeing her run away.

Clarke looks up at her friends, who are staring at her expectantly. “Did you say something?”

“I said you have to call her!” Raven urges.

At the sight of Octavia nodding her head violently, Clarke sighs and pulls her phone out of her pocket and selects Lexa’s name from her contacts. Clarke loses track of the number of times the phone rings. Her stomach jolts when she hears Lexa’s voice, but quickly realizes that it’s her voicemail.

_You have reached Lexa’s phone. I am not available at the moment, please leave a message._

“Hi Lexa, it’s Clarke. Please call me back when you can.”

Clarke sighs and puts down her phone dejectedly. Raven sneaks an arm around her and pats her back comfortingly.

“She’ll call you back. I’m sure she’s just busy.”

 

***

 

Lexa is definitely not _just busy_.

It has been three days, and Clarke has been calling Lexa every day without success. She knows Lexa well enough to know that she is avoiding her. She has seen Lexa’s tendency to flee first hand, and she has decided to take matters into her own hands. She decides to call Lexa one last time before resorting to drastic measures.

-

Lexa is lying on her bed, propped up on her red pillow and staring at Clarke’s painting when her phone rings. She picks it up carefully and puts it back down again after seeing Clarke’s name on the screen. This is the fourth time she has called, and Lexa has not had the courage to answer. A few moments after the phone stops ringing, a notification pops up, telling Lexa she has a new voicemail. Lexa taps her screen resignedly.

“Hi, it’s me again. Please call me back,” a pleading voice calls from her phone.

Lexa sighs at buries her face in her pillow. She hates putting Clarke through this, but she is not ready to hear what Clarke will inevitably have to say when she does call her back. Lexa can hear her already: “Listen, I really like you as a friend, but I don’t want to take things further than that.” Lexa is not ready to be rejected, and so she puts off talking to Clarke. She knows she is probably making things worse by avoiding her. She thinks that, if she had addressed the issue quickly, she could probably have made up an excuse along the lines of _I thought you had something on your face_. Pathetic, she knows.

-

Clarke bounds up the stairs and stops in front of Lexa’s door. She takes the time to catch her breath before knocking. Her heart leaps in her chest when the knob turns, but her smile falters when she sees a frowning Anya standing in front of her.

“Hi Anya… I’m here to see Lexa.”

Anya stares at Clarke and crosses her arms. Clarke’s heart sinks; there is no way Anya is letting her see her sister. Her suspicions are confirmed when Anya says:

“Lexa’s not here right now.”

Clarke knows that there is no point in arguing with her. And she’s ashamed to admit that Lexa’s sister intimidates her. “Ok, sorry. I’ll go then.”

Anya catches Clarke’s arm as she turns to leave and ushers her inside. “I told you she’s not here,” she says louder.

“She doesn’t want me to let you in,” Anya whispers in Clarke’s ear, nudging her towards Lexa’s door.

Clarke gives Anya a grateful smile before knocking on Lexa’s door. Lexa’s voice calls from behind the door.

“Thanks Anya, I really-“

Lexa stops short when she sees Clarke’s head poking around the door.

“Can I come in?” she asks hesitantly, seeing Lexa tense at the sight of her.

Lexa sighs and gestures for Clarke to come in. She had been hoping to avoid this conversation for as long as possible, but now that Clarke is here, she hopes to get it over with as fast as possible. She braces herself.

“Your sister wouldn’t let me in… I had to push past her to talk to you,” Clarke explains ruefully.

A hint of a smile appears on Lexa’s lips. “I know she let you in. She is a lot more sentimental than she lets show.”

Clarke smiles widely at Lexa, and, for a moment, Lexa has trouble believing that this girl is here to reject her. She scolds herself for her false hope. Why else would she be here?

“You got me,” Clarke admits, her arms raised in surrender. After a moment, she adds “I can go if you want. I was just really hoping to get to talk to you.”

Lexa wants to tell Clarke to leave in order to avoid having to listen to her rejection, but she bites her lip and shakes her head, fighting back her tears. She just wants this to be over so that she can go back to ignoring her emotions.

“You can stay,” she manages to choke out.

Clarke smiles kindly at her and sits down next to her on the bed. Lexa watches her carefully. _This is it_ , she tells herself.

Clarke takes a deep breath. “Listen, I said that we should be friends because I thought you weren’t interested in anything romantic. But the other night has made me think that maybe you are, and I don’t want to let an opportunity like this go. We get along really well, and I think you’re beautiful and I would love to take you out on a date,” she blurts out before she can lose her courage.

The stunned look on Lexa’s face makes Clarke giggle. “I guess that this wasn’t the conversation you were anticipating.”

“Yes,” Lexa bursts out.

Clarke cocks an eyebrow, confused. “Yes what?”

“Yes I would like to go on a date with you.”

Lexa’s cheeks redden at the confession, but she returns Clarke’s grin with a shy smile. Clarke stands up quickly and claps her hands.

“Great, I’ll pick you up tomorrow night at 7?”

“Alright. Where will we be going?”

“It’s a surprise,” Clarke beams.

“I hate surprises,” Lexa grumbles, a hint of a smile still on her lips.

Clarke laughs and turns to leave.

“Wear something casual,” Clarke orders over her shoulder before closing the door behind her.

 

***

 

“Clarke, give me my 200$.”

“What?” Clarke asks distractedly.

“My 200$... Nevermind, I’ll just get it myself,” Octavia sighs, leaning over Clarke and grabbing two 100$ bills.

“Come on Clarke, you know the rules!” Jasper encourages. “Someone passes _go_ , you give them 200$. If you’re not feeling up to being the banker tonight, I can do it.”

“Yeah, maybe you should do it tonight, Jasper. I guess I’m a bit distracted,” Clarke concedes.

Usually, when they play Monopoly, Clarke is the banker and Octavia is the winner. It’s a tradition. Bellamy won once, and has been referring to himself as the Monopoly Champion since then, much to Octavia’s annoyance.

Octavia tucks her bills under her growing stack of money with a satisfied smile and turns to Clarke.

“What’s on your mind?”

“It’s Lexa.”

Bellamy excuses himself to get another beer. He tries to be supportive as much as possible, but conversations about love and romance make him uncomfortable. Octavia frowns at Clarke.

“What has she done now?”

“Actually, I asked her out on a date.”

“No way,” Raven breathes, amazed.

Octavia wriggles excitedly in her seat. “That’s great! So she finally answered her phone?”

“No she didn’t,” Clarke starts with a smile. “I went over to her place and talked to her.”

“Oooooh,” Monty and Jasper chime in simultaneously.

“I’m afraid it was nothing very exciting, boys. I just went there, talked to her a bit, asked her on a date and left.”

Everyone is sporting a disappointed look as Bellamy sits down in his spot with a beer in his hand. Octavia gives Clarke a little slap on the shoulder.

“You didn’t kiss her?”

“No. Not that I didn’t want to, but I figure I should wait for the right moment.”

She smiles as she thinks of how shocked Lexa looked when Clarke asked her out. She was obviously not expecting it, which is understandable in retrospect, since Clarke had mentioned that she was happy to be just friends. That hadn’t meant that she wasn’t open to anything romantic (quite the opposite), but she had sincerely thought that Lexa wasn’t interested. _That’ll teach me to jump to conclusions_ , she thinks.

“Claaaarke!” Octavia moans.

Clarke looks up, confused. “Huh? What?”

“It’s your turn. Come visit me over here, my hotels are beautifully situated and reasonably priced!” Octavia smiles sweetly, motioning to her daunting row of hotels. As usual, Octavia is dominating the game and has a whole row of the board covered with her hotels.

Clarke grins and rolls the dice. She moves her token across the board and lands on Octavia’s most expensive property. She counts out her money and sighs when she realizes that she doesn’t have enough.

“Well I’m bankrupt,” she states, standing up. “Now if you kids don’t mind, I have a date to organize.”

 

***

 

At 7:05, Lexa turns from her reflection in the mirror and gives Anya a resigned look.

“She’s not coming,” Lexa sighs.

“Come on, Lex. Not everyone is as freakishly punctual as you are. She’s just running a bit late,” Anya reassures, patting her sister’s shoulder.

“You think?”

“Yes.”

Lexa turns back to her reflection and examines herself. Her sister helped her braid her hair, and she is pleased with the result. Black eyeliner frames her scared eyes. She spent at least twenty minutes making sure that the lines were perfect, despite her sisters protests that it looked fine the way it was and that you would have to be really _really_ close to notice the imperfections. Lexa didn’t mention that she was hoping to get really close to Clarke tonight.

She shifts her gaze down to her clothes. After a long deliberation, she settled on skinny jeans with a black t-shirt and her favorite pair of Converses. She sees her reflection start to fidget, and turns towards her sister.

“Is this too casual?”

“You look great, Lexa.”

They have been having this conversation all afternoon, and Anya has lost count of the number of times Lexa has changed clothes.

“I should have worn the skirt.”

“But then how would she know you’re a lesbian?” Anya jokes, trying to lighten the mood. The scowl Lexa gives her informs her that it’s not working.

Lexa is about to lecture Anya on stereotypes when there is a knock at the door. Lexa shoos her sister away and quickly makes her way to the door. Not wanting to seem too eager, she takes a deep breath before calmly opening the door. Her attempt at nonchalance fails when she finds Clarke smiling brightly at her, and Lexa can’t help the smile that blossoms on her lips.

“Sorry I’m late,” Clarke apologizes.

“Are you really? I hadn’t even noticed,” Lexa lies.

Clarke’s smile widens, clearly seeing through Lexa’s lie, but she chooses not to say anything. She reaches out and takes Lexa’s hand, giving it a small squeeze.

“We should get going.”

Lexa closes the door behind her, still clutching Clarke’s hand, and walks downstairs with her. As usual, holding Clarke’s hand makes Lexa’s mind foggy. About halfway down, the fog lifts long enough for her to force her mouth to function.

“You still haven’t told me where we’re going.”

Clarke grins at her. “You’ll see.”

They make their way down to Clarke’s car, and Lexa regretfully lets go of Clarke’s hand to settle herself down in the passenger seat. She considers taking Clarke’s hand again once they are inside her car, but reminds herself that Clarke will need her hand to change gears. Lexa folds her own hands in her lap to resist the temptation.

At a red light, Clarke turns to look at Lexa. “So, how are you doing?”

“I am well thank you, and yourself?”

Lexa is always polite, but she tends to become very formal when she is nervous. She bites her lip, hoping Clarke doesn’t notice.

“I’m doing great, thanks.”

“And your friends? They are well?” Lexa asks, trying to keep the conversation going. Social skills are not her forte, but she makes an effort to avoid uncomfortable silence.

“Yeah, they’re doing fine. Octavia is sort of officially dating Lincoln now, I hope you’re ok with that.”

“Lincoln is a nice person, and he deserves to be happy. The fact that he called me the other day and talked exclusively about Octavia for an hour leads me to believe that he is happy with this arrangement. I hope your friend is too.”

“Oh yeah, Octavia won’t shut up about him.”

Lexa smiles at this. From what she knows of Clarke’s friend, Octavia is outgoing, forward and loud. She has no difficulty imagining Octavia rambling on about Lincoln.

“You and Octavia seem to be good friends,” Lexa comments.

If Clarke notices the hint of jealousy in Lexa’s voice, she ignores it.

“Yeah, Raven, Octavia and I have been best friends since elementary school. They used to call us the Three Musketeers because we did everything together.”

Lexa envies that kind of friendship. She has always been the kind of person who mostly keeps to herself, and was never one to have many friends. Her formality and coldness tends to push people away. All of her friends have always been friends of Anya’s first.

Lexa’s train of thoughts is interrupted by Clarke pulling into a parking spot.

“We’re here!” Clarke announces as she turns off the engine and turns towards Lexa.

Lexa slips out of the car and looks around. She recognizes Clarke’s building immediately, and can’t help but wonder what Clarke has planned.  She turns to Clarke as she joins her on the sidewalk.

“Your place?”

“Raven was nice enough to vacate for the night,” Clarke confides. “Too forward for you?” she asks jokingly.

Lexa blushes and Clarke takes her hand once more, leading her to her apartment. Clarke gives her hand a reassuring squeeze as she leads her upstairs. Lexa is fairly certain that Clarke is about to lead her into her bedroom, and she is not entirely opposed, but Clarke takes a turn and leads Lexa to a door she hadn’t noticed before. Clarke opens it, revealing a staircase.

“Come on,” she urges, smiling back at Lexa.

The staircase is narrow and winding, and Lexa climbs up behind Clarke, unsure of what to expect. What she doesn’t expect, is for a breeze of fresh air to hit her. She looks up to find that she is standing on a rooftop. From there, she has a good view of the small houses in the neighborhood, and a beautiful view of the sun setting. She finds Clarke waiting for her next to a stack of pillows and blankets.

“Would you like to watch the sunset with me?” she asks, suddenly unsure. What if Lexa thinks this is a silly idea? What if she gets bored just staring at the sky?”

“I would love to,” Lexa answers with a smile, and Clarke’s concerns dissipate.

Clarke buries herself in the pile of pillows and covers herself with a blanket. She lifts the cover and lets Lexa slip in next to her. She notes how Lexa is careful not to touch her, but doesn’t say anything. Instead, she pulls out a box of pizza from behind her.

“Pizza?” she offers, opening the box.

Lexa smiles and picks up a slice.

“Looks like this is sort of becoming a tradition,” Clarke comments in between mouthfuls. “I’m not very good at cooking, if you hadn’t figured it out. Besides, I love pizza.”

Lexa nods and takes a bite from her pizza. She doesn’t indulge in unhealthy food very often, but she enjoys the occasional treat, especially with Clarke.

Once the pizza is gone, Clarke and Lexa are left in an awkward silence. Lexa tries to think of something to say, and starts to fidget nervously. Clarke smiles and pulls out a slip of paper from her pocket.

“I came prepared.”

“What is it?”

“Topics of conversation!”

Lexa can’t help the edges of her mouth from curving up. She finds it amusing, albeit unsurprising that Clarke would do this. She is also relieved that she doesn’t have to start a conversation.

Clarke peers down at her paper. “What’s your favorite color?”

Lexa takes a moment to consider the question. “My favorite color to wear is black. But I love the color green, especially the shade of green that leaves have in spring.”

“I know exactly what you’re talking about. In French, it’s called _vert tendre_.”

Lexa raises an eyebrow. “You speak French?”

Clarke shrugs. “My dad taught me.”

When it’s clear that Clarke will not offer any further explanation, Lexa asks “And your favorite color?”

“Blue,” Clarke states without hesitation. “The dark blue of the sky right before nighttime.”

Lexa nods. “Yes, that is a beautiful color.”

After a beat, Clarke looks back down at her slip of paper.

“Favorite animal?” she grins.

“Horses,” Lexa answers immediately. “They are so graceful and beautiful.”

“Can you ride them?”

“Yes. I took lessons as a child. I go out to the country when I can in order to ride. It helps clear my mind.”

Clarke bites her lip. She shakes her head to clear her mind of the image of Lexa riding a hose, hips swinging and hair billowing in the wind.

“I like birds,” Clarke stutters. “Or it’s more the idea of them that I like. I wish I could fly, and see the world from high up in the sky. It must make all your problems seem so insignificant.”

Lexa is the kind of person who likes to keep her feet on the ground, both in the metaphorical and practical sense. She is a realist, and always tries to look at things as they are. She also hates flying, and has only been on an airplane once, when it was absolutely necessary. Anya had to bring her on the plane by force and give her a sleeping pill to get her through it.

“How is your artwork going?” Lexa asks, attempting to get the conversation going without resorting to Clarke’s list.

“Not too bad. I’ve kind of lost inspiration for the nature-themed stuff, so I’m thinking of moving on to portraits,” she explains. “You should let me draw you sometime,” she adds on second thought.

Lexa nods. “I would like that.”

The thought of Clarke’s gaze scrutinizing her while she is being drawn daunts Lexa, but she is curious to see herself through Clarke’s eyes. She knows that the blonde is a gifted artist, and she is interested in seeing more of her work.

“How about you, Lexa? Do you have any plans for the summer?”

“Yes, I have a job at a research facility. I’ll be working in a laboratory for most of the summer.”

“That sounds like a great opportunity,” Clarke encourages.

“Yes, I think it will be very interesting. I start on Monday.”

“Good luck! You have to call me to tell me all about it!”

“Alright,” Lexa agrees. She can’t help but smile at the thought that Clarke cares enough to want to hear about her job. This is not someone who cares about her only because they were friends with Anya first. Clarke likes her for who she is, and wasn’t scared off by her cool exterior and formality. 

When Lexa turns towards Clarke, she finds her burying herself deeper in the pillows in order to lie down. Lexa lies down next to her and lets her leg press against Clarke’s. She notices Clarke’s small smile as she leans into her and looks up at the sky.

The sky is turning into Clarke’s favorite shade of blue and Clarke feels a wave of happiness hit her as she stares up at the sky and feels Lexa’s warmth next to her. She thinks that, in this moment, there is no place that she would rather be. She thinks of all the things that have happened in her life, and she feels as if every moment has led to this instant of perfect bliss. If Lexa had not lost her phone, they never would have met. If Clarke had met Lexa earlier, she would not have been ready to be romantically involved with anyone. It feels as though the stars have aligned.

Lexa feels herself relax for the first time in years. The weight that has been suffocating her ever since she and Costia parted ways seems to lift. The guilt she has been carrying around since their separation no longer stirs in the pit of her stomach. The barrier that stops her from opening up is demolished by the knowledge that Clarke cares about her. Lexa feels that, around Clarke, she can be brave at last.

Neither of them knows how much time has passed. The only indicator of how long they have been there is the dark sky above their heads. It’s a clear night and the stars and moon shine brightly.

“A shooting star,” Clarke breathes, pointing up at the sky. “Make a wish.”

Lexa looks at the patch of sky Clarke is pointing at and spots the shooting star dragging its light across the sky. She hums in acknowledgement and makes a wish.

Clarke tears her eyes from the sky and looks at Lexa. “What did you wish for?”

“I can’t tell you or it won’t come true,” Lexa answers seriously, a hint of a smile flickering on her lips.

Clarke pouts and Lexa smiles. “I can show you,” she whispers, suddenly feeling brave.

Lexa cups Clarke’s neck and leans forward. She stops before she reaches Clarke’s lips, waiting for permission.

She doesn’t have to wait long.

Clarke tilts her head up and presses her lips against Lexa’s. They kiss slowly and gently, both wanting to take in this moment and make it last. Lexa sucks gently on Clarke’s bottom lips as she runs her hands through her hair. Clarke reaches under the blankets and places a hand on Lexa’s waist as she stifles a moan. She drags her other hand through Lexa’s hair, which has come undone from its braid at some point.

They part to catch their breath and Clarke smiles at Lexa’s flushed face. She leans over her and straddles her, effectively immobilizing her, but Lexa doesn’t complain. Clarke leans down and kisses Lexa in the spot where her neck meets her shoulder and slowly makes her way up her neck, sending shivers down Lexa’s spine. She then places a kiss on her ear and slow kisses down her cheek before stopping when she reaches her mouth. When she doesn’t kiss her immediately, Lexa starts to wriggle impatiently under her, making Clarke giggle. 

Lexa brings her hands up to Clarke’s face and guides her mouth towards her own. She sighs into the kiss and brings her hands down to Clarke’s back, pulling her closer. Clarke parts her lips, asking for access, which Lexa grants without having to be asked twice. She nips at Lexa’s lip and hums in approval at the moan that it elicits from Lexa.

Finally, they pull apart and Clarke buries her smile in Lexa’s neck. Lexa wraps her arms around Clarke and gives her neck a quick kiss before nuzzling it. They lose track of how long they stay like this, tangled in each other’s arms. They eventually drift off to sleep, smiling peacefully with the knowledge that this is the start of something good.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry this took a while to update, I wasn't happy with the date scene and I ended up rewriting it completely.
> 
> I hope you have enjoyed this story. I want to take a moment to thank everyone who has taken the time to leave kudos and comments on this story. Your messages make my day and motivate me to write. :)
> 
> Come say hi: misslymiss.tumblr.com


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